solace mode.

there are days when you're sad for no reason. i just enjoy solace today. and there's no reason why, there's no reason for everything at all times. maybe, it's just the early morning shift.. i really find december mornings so gloomy. i can feel the christmas breeze now but it doesn't have anything to do with my gloomy-ness today. there are days when you just wanna be left alone and just be silent in a corner, for no reason, you just want to. today, i enjoyed the early morning bus ride to work whilst listening to franco's castaway and the like. i'm just sad.

sometimes, it's difficult to be different, to be unusual, to be weird, to be eccentric, yeah i know they all mean the same. people most of the time just couldn't respect the fact that you're just being yourself. some people are just too superficial to understand you while it's just easy to understand that if someone doesn't wish to talk just respect that. nothing personal. when you're quiet in a corner it seems like your silence will kill them. i'm not trying to be cool when i don't talk or every time i ignore the people around me, this is just the way i am and i don't think i even need to explain. 'normal' people just wouldn't and couldn't 'get' it. i'm not suicidal and i guess if my silence is a killer, the hell i care. it's hard to deal with mediocrity, i guess. but i'd rather not. i'd rather stand in the middle of the crowd whilst the world spins around and or sit somewhere and watch whilst the leaves dance with the wind in circles. i love the word poetic justice. i'm burn out with my job i guess. gimme some space. i feel like being underwater and i need my oxygen tank real quick, breathe....air..wind..hangin! i'm digging Portishead right now...