Boho

Lately, I've been grappling with persistent splitting headaches whose source remains elusive. Stress could be a culprit, perhaps stemming from the shift from freelancing to full-time work, leaving me on edge. At times, my anxiety skyrockets, and I'm unsure how to navigate it. I've found myself reflecting on life choices and envisioning changes for the upcoming year, craving a sense of calm to soothe my frayed nerves.

While diving into Christmas shopping, I yearn to relish the holiday season, but the sharp drop in temperature exacerbates my headaches, making me realize my body's discomfort with extreme cold. Despite my love for the chilly weather, I now shiver and get goosebumps when seeking fresh air by opening windows or doors.

This year has been a reflective journey, prompting me to reconsider life decisions. Work-related stress burdens me, urging me to seek inner peace and practice self-compassion, echoing the profound words of Nayyirah Waheed: "be softer with you. you are a breathing thing. a memory to someone. a home to a life."

My bohemian spirit beckons, wondering where the carefree child within me has gone—a sentiment beautifully captured in Cynthia Alexander's song, "Hiroshima."

Life So Far

Hello, everyone. With just 46 days left until Christmas, I find myself experiencing a different kind of holiday season this year. My sister and I eagerly set up our Christmas tree back in September, knowing that the upcoming festivities would keep us busy, as is our tradition each year - from adorning the house to planning our intimate holiday dinners.

Transitioning back to full-time work after freelancing for many years has been an adjustment I wasn't entirely prepared for until recently. Work has been filled with its fair share of drama, with colleagues coming and going due to stress, workload, and various other issues. While I've grown accustomed to such situations and should, in theory, be more resilient, I still feel the impact when a co-worker departs, whether by choice or circumstance.

It's important to dispel the notion that working from home equates to a stress-free environment. In reality, the pressures are just as present as in an on-site office setting. The main distinction lies in the absence of face-to-face interaction with colleagues, unless you actively engage with them due to close proximity or shared tasks. Building connections is inevitable, given the smaller team size and daily collaborations. Yet, no matter how demanding work becomes, we soldier on, business as usual.

Personally, I tend to limit my circle of friends at work. Saying goodbye is always the most challenging part, especially once you've gotten to know someone beyond your initial impressions. There may be co-workers you initially clash with, but understanding their perspective can shift your perception. I firmly believe in being kind to everyone, as we never truly know the battles others may be facing. Hence, I prefer to maintain a neutral stance and avoid being overly opinionated, recognizing the complexity of trust in the workplace and steering clear of conflicts. Toxic work environments, after all, are a prime driver of attrition.

Looking ahead, I'm embracing some online holiday shopping. My siblings and I have already purchased our gifts for one another, neatly wrapped and nestled beneath the twinkling lights of our Christmas tree. This way, we can focus on the joy of preparing our menus and decorating our home.

While I genuinely want to fully revamp my home office, sleep remains a precious priority. One of the blessings of working from home is the daily presence of my beloved cats, offering comfort and a touch of humor. 'Nuf said."