Wandering Soul

I think I've finally reached my ultimate burnout stage, and I feel bad for my sister, who has become the sponge for all my rants. One day, I just blurted it out and decided to go on a trip, which didn't really leave her with much of a choice but to go along with my spur-of-the-moment craziness. I'm always the impulsive one. Luckily, she's excellent at making our travel itineraries, no matter how last-minute it is. I don’t know how she does it, but she does. It’s a skill I haven't been able to adapt to because I’m used to planning ahead but I’m also impulsive—so go figure. Somehow, it works for me in some strange way.

Anyway, I decided to make the most of my couple of days off and traveled six hours away with little sleep and no clear plans—no idea where to go or what to do. I asked my sister to book our accommodation the night before, although I had already packed my bags two days ahead, thinking I might travel soon, just not knowing where. When I told her I was going, she said she couldn’t let me travel alone. So technically, she was compelled to come with me on this trip because I hadn’t slept enough, and it could lead to a series of unfortunate events, especially after a graveyard shift. Off we went on this impromptu trip, purchasing tickets just minutes before the bus left.

The 6-hour journey was supposed to be grueling, but my squeamishness about traveling after such a long time took over. I barely slept the whole time, maybe because of the Vietnamese coffee my sister let me have hours before. I wasn't in the best state during the trip because I kept forcing myself to stay awake to enjoy the beautiful view from the window. The cold, fresh air from the window tempted me to sleep, but I kept telling myself, “Snap out of it! You can't sleep right now!”

Day 1 officially began when we arrived just after 2 PM. After more than six hours without sleep and no breakfast, we finally reached our destination, but somehow, exhaustion didn’t get in the way. After locating our accommodation and paying tourist fees, we went to a trending spot that we found on TikTok. We didn’t pick it because it was famous—honestly,

we couldn’t care less about that—but because it served vegan/vegetarian dishes, which are still uncommon in this country for some reason.

The food was great, with big portions that left us feeling like we had eaten all day. It was a bit on the pricey side, as expected with mostly vegan and vegetarian dishes. What I loved about the cafe was the view and the rustic aesthetic. Plus, the people running it were very personable. It felt like a café/souvenir shop, which was cool.

The last time we visited this town was 16 years ago, and a lot has changed. The roads are better now, and there are many hole-in-the-wall cafés and endless places to stay, so you can pick one upon arrival. What keeps this town's charm intact is that they don’t allow outsiders to own property or businesses, keeping things local, which is a good thing in many ways. Despite the progress, the town’s old charm remained.

Day 2: We decided to have breakfast at a restaurant just a short walk from our lodging. The place had been around for a long time and had expanded. It used to be a small diner made of pine wood, but now it’s four times its original size and has a fine-dining vibe with an American country home feel. The photographs of the natives, which tell the town’s history, are still there. We were a bit disappointed that there weren’t many vegetarian options on the menu, but since we were famished, we had to make do with what was available. The town has a few places with vegetarian options, but they’re mostly located on the outskirts.

After breakfast, we took a walk for some fresh air and also figured out where to purchase tickets for our return trip the next day. We visited a church we had gone to a long time ago, and not much had changed. It was an Episcopalian church, so we just stopped by since it was open to the public, but it was empty. The first time we went there, it was summer, so it was packed. November is the best time to visit because it’s not tourist season, just lots of backpackers from different countries.

By noon, we weren’t very hungry, so we stopped at a place that sold homemade wheat bread and bought a few to take away. For lunch, we picked another hole-in-the-wall café, just a short walk from the bakery, which also offered vegetarian food. I had their vegetarian curry, and my sister had pesto pasta. Before heading back to our accommodation, of course, we couldn’t leave without bringing home the famous lemon pie the town is now known for. Our older sibling had specifically asked for it. To cap off the day, we went to this food spot which holds a special place in our hearts. We had visited it before with our mom when she was still alive. This time, instead of a full meal, we opted for some refreshing cold treats—because in this town, it’s hard to ever feel truly hungry. Maybe it’s the weather. As night descended, we began getting ready for our early morning journey back.

Day 3: We took the earliest bus back home, which left at 5 AM, and it was pitch-black outside! I was totally exhausted, but I’d definitely do it all over again. Like I always tell myself, “Go, just go.” Skip the whole planning thing. There’s nothing more exhilarating than traveling spontaneously and unannounced. Just make sure you have travel funds—that’s all. Maybe out of the country next year? Who knows. First, I’ll make sure I’m physically fit for it. My goal for now is to get ample rest. 😴

Self-repair

 

Lately, I’ve been caught in a cycle of self-doubt and procrastination. I realize I need time away to focus on finding inner peace because I’ve been struggling with my own inner battles. I feel drained, stuck in negativity, and constantly questioning whether my best efforts are ever enough.

I’ve been reflecting a lot on what the coming year might hold and considering the changes I need to make. Right now, I feel like a tumbleweed, drifting aimlessly without direction. I think I need to escape somewhere where I can breathe fresh air and reconnect with myself. Moving forward feels essential, and I believe traveling more next year could help me regain clarity and purpose.

I’m searching for balance and working to shake off the weight of negativity I’ve been carrying. I crave the warmth of the sun, the excitement of new places, and a clearer vision for what’s ahead. I need to heal—I feel like a broken machine trying to piece itself back together.

Little Treasures

Hatsune Miku, Satoru Gojo, Kasugano Sora
& Ana Folger figures

Ok, so I promise to stop at five of these Hirono, and then I’ll move on to collecting Pop Mart's Skull Panda. As I said, I don’t hoard; I just collect a few. My interest in anime figures waned, and I stopped at eight because I moved on to collecting Hirono. Anyway, collecting gives me a sense of identity, emotional comfort, and enjoyment. Unboxing these pieces makes me feel like a child, giddy with excitement. It’s a brief escape from adulthood.

The emergence of Hirono figures

Lang created the character Hirono for Popmart. With Hirono, Lang aimed to capture the full range of human emotions—love, joy, sadness, fear, kindness, and even moments of vulnerability.

Robot 

The characters bear the inscription

I am not a toy, a plea to recognize their worth and not discard them easily. As robots dedicate their entire lives to serving humans, they are often discarded after aging or making a minor mistake.

Series: The Hirono Little Mischief series by Pop Mart is about a mischievous character named Hirono who loves getting into trouble and playing pranks.

Warrior

Hirono often shows a protective side, which is the essence of this warrior figure. He stands ready to defend what he considers home.

Series: The Hirono Shelter series is a blind-box collection by Pop Mart that conveys the search for peace and solace in a chaotic world.

Devilry

Red, to cover up cowardice, and pretending to be strong. The world continually

evolves into a new identity, driving away uneasiness.

Series: The Hirono Mime series by Pop Mart is a collection of blind-box toys exploring themes of identity, complex emotions, and the hidden pathways of the human mind.

Reference: 

Tiktok: @fortherwin_

Sundaze

I've been watching a lot of The 1975 lately because their videos keep bombarding my feeds. I don’t know, I just love watching Matty Healy do his own thing on stage, singing as if he’s in a world of his own, like he just doesn’t care. His stage antics can be both annoying and enjoyable, making you envious of how carefree he seems—with a bottle of alcohol in one hand and a mic in the other, traversing the stage like no one’s watching. I have to admit, the band’s songs are a magnet for people who are addicted to sadness, heart-wrenching, and melodic music.

I never knew about The 1975 until I heard “About You.” The song is so painfully personal that listening to it feels almost intrusive, like the lyrics belong in a private journal. But I guess it resonates with a lot of people, which explains its popularity.

This is just me taking my mind off things because I want to disappear so badly these days. I wish I could just go back indefinitely. I wish I may.

Mellon Collie And The Infinite Sadness

I'm back on the graveyard shift, and I literally feel like a ghost working at night again. But that’s life. My body clock has been irrevocably damaged from all the past schedule changes, so nothing's likely to bring it back to normal. I avoided visiting graveyards this All Souls' and All Saints' Day because I hate the crowds. 

Living in a really touristy area means even the graveyards are swarmed with people who often treat them like campsites, losing the true essence of the season. As much as I wanted to visit my mom's niche, I didn't go—it’s a sad place for me, and I talk to her every night or day (?) before I sleep to tell her about my day, whether it’s been rough or not.

One nice thing about columbariums is that they’re blessed by a priest and prayed over every November 1st. Still, I prefer solitude when I visit my mom’s urn; I don’t need to chit-chat or make small talk with strangers.

Anyway, moving on. My siblings decided to join the neighborhood in the whole trick-or-treat thing, which didn’t happen on the 31st due to bad weather, so it was postponed to yesterday. Not that I cared—I was asleep and just heard a loud cheer that startled me awake. I almost fell out of bed, only to realize the noise came from kids excitedly trick-or-treating and enjoying the candy my siblings prepared for them. In short, it was a hit.

I can already feel the Christmas breeze these days. The cold front is finally here, and for someone like me, who’s always cold, it feels like borderline hypothermia.

Working at night makes me feel like a ghost, hovering back and forth.